hahhahaz~ today i so~ happy!! hehehz. smilin smilin the whole day. hahahz. i duno y i cant stop smilin. hehhez.
evil. pangsai & stacy... both of them evil. go eat shit den die. evil. not gonna talk to both of u! -tryin- hahahz.
er~ shall not b updatin daily cos no time & my mom doesn want me to go online anw. yup. so yar. to~ all... my faithful readers... dun b sad altho u'll most probably miss all the excitin... cum embaressin incidents that happened unless~ u hears it frm those pple that pass round & round. hahahhaz.
cos i dun want to disappoint my parents any further. must study. hahz. tryin okay. startin frm tmr~. hahhaz. will. blieve me. have faith in me pple!! must tel me! okay?? must remind me to... promise?? hahahz. totally by myself right?? shhh~... dun ans that... hahahaz
the public speaking thingy was fun. luffin2 all the way. that guci guci ku la, kept makin me laugh. to--tal--ly!
and xiao wei is guci guci ku & jeannette is my darlin dear. hahahz.
//life just keeps gettin better [:
totally sia! today was so fun~ afte sch la. went out wif cheryl t-o. hahahz. laughed till we cried.
in the bus, this sec1 gurl tried to tell us how some~ guy "disturbed" her at cine in a high pitched voice. u shld hear it! like~ i duno how to type-. cheryl kept takin my foto & i was tryin my darness to understand what the f-ish she was saying. when finally she stopped -thanked god- & looked infrnt, cher started luffin & i did the silent dr.evil luff. bloodie hell~ that gurl turned & looked at me all of a sudden. i was f-reakin panic okay~! i duno wad to do & jus asked cher, "you called her alr???". i duno what to say sia. hahhaz. the funniest thing was that that gurl asked me & cher what's our shoe size. what??? how the hell would i kno rite?? she even took out her shoe to tell us that hers was 7!!! totally okay~ cant stop luffin-. was controlling.
at taka,mc. we competely made a fool out of ourselves. TOTALly! why?? malu-ated. hehz. luff so hard/much then i almost choke. cheryl spilled her coke cause she--- [luffin] tried to squeeze thru & her--- boobies pushed the coke of the table!! hahhahaz. cant stand it. & my nose was so red cos i was havin a bad bad flu. argh~!
cant stand it argh. hahhaz. eh! i cant rmb alr!!!
on our way home/to the bus stop behind take, 190 was across the road. i was like, "190 190!" cause my sis asked me to be back by 1640 [which i so didn make it on time]. before cher could finish her sentence... i pulled her hand & crossed the road. hahhaz. & her sentence was, "how are we pos to....." hhahahz. totally. talked all the way home. hahahz.
for the summary on the day... pls visit 1/2 chair. hahhahz
was smilin the whole day.
i duno why but it's alright
it shld be that way
mrs fang scared the hell out of me. no "hi" or "are u okay?" but rather she asked what's wrong with me when i gave her the letter. what? what wrong with me sia? hahhaz she said i had poor management & asked whether the hols was enuff. hahahz. i told her it wasn. hahahz. crazy~ thought i did smthg wrong sia. hahahz
totally.
i duno.
i'm confuse.
does she know?
will she refuse?
i dun think i like anymore
but it all seems so true
everyone sayin she's THE one
but there'll never be the chance
i rather not tel
i rather not let her know
den destroy what friendship we have now
den me walkin solo
dun lift my hopes any higher
just tell me the truth; right smack in my face
so i can move on before she hits me in the heart
sayin words that will tear me apart
today walked ard like usual. no jingle jangle when i saw her. no dup dup when i hear name. no- no- no more. totally. she's someone. she's just my fren. told u guys to give me min 2 weeks den it'll all be gone/over [wink]. & it's not even 2 weeks rite?? hahhaz. totally. think i haven change. a lil left. i really need to change.
//honest. i dun-- anymore
Hey~ u know wad?? 3 days was too short damn it! bloodie hell~ my sis has to work la. argh~... The weather was freaky hot! h-o-t! gg back in june? durin winter. accordin to my mom la. not confirm yet. lookin ard at curtin uni. my sis gg in october. cant wait 4them to go~ [evil] but somehow, sad to say, i do need them here.
haiya~ y?? y m i back here?? in singapore?? damn-- they're like so utra frenly unlike singaporeans. u walked down the road or smthin, they'll either smile/nod or say hi?? but here??! pple stare at u & if u LOOKed back, they think u has smthg against them or ur interested in them. LOSER! grow up! damn & the shops, the salesperson so totally obvious that they care or wadever cos they kept talkin to u or asked whether everything's okay. HERE?? s'pore? they dun give a shit to u! u have to approach them for assistance.
the gurls over there so pretty~. i like-- they're so freakin pretty tt i dun really notice the guys. hah! totalleh not me~ eh? oh ya~ perth such a dead place. yar~ totalleh can concentrate there cos there's nthg much to do unless u drives.
to [her]: dun understand how or y [u] cld lk me in tt way-- i didn even do anythin to [u]... did i?? not ?? guess [u] better stop cos i'll probably end up breakin [ur] heart & i'm not worth [ur] like/lurve, yar babe? [ure] too good 4 me & stop sayin tt no1 cares bt [u], it aint true.
//i'm pissed off ever since e plane landed in s'pore but i cant seem 2find e reason y...
cant [u] see tt I'm suffocating?
tt I'm gaspin for air?
yet my heart is torn & tattered--
when I hear [she]'s 'flirtin'
kirthika was darn funny. 4 once, i was speechless. hahahz. u kno wad?? i can rmb wad i said to her den i was pissed so i hit her boobs. she said , "hit it again arh~ if u want". so i did. then she said, " no pain one. hit again arh.. u can play drum oso". totally rite?? i was speechless. hahahz. totally. hhahaz.
afte remedial, wen out with pei, nat, marcia, amanda, kirthika & olive. hehz. eat at ljs AGAIN. no other place. hahahz. on the way to ljs, there's this grp of pri 6/sec1s?? they're gettin on our nerve. hehz. esp this cina gurl. she tries to do THE walk, THE bounce. hello?? 1stly, u r wearin ugly ah lian clothings. 2ndly, u r ugly. 3rdly, i DUN like ur darn face. i walked 1st den pushed her, asked her to move!! den pei han. followed by marcia & olive. hahahz. so fun. [grin]
totally~. saw this bung, pei's member. muhahahz. totally U.G.L.Y haircut. hahahz. hmmm. yup. waited for iris cos she went to shit at paragon. yup. hahhaz. so long okay. hahahz. not really la. got ourselves into major trouble. among us, it's considered "MAJOR". cant tel ya what but pei's innocent face at that moment was hilarious. hahahz. totally. shld have video cam it. hahhaz.
then went to heeren. intendin to take neo but somehow dot dot dot everyone seemed to finish-ED spendin their $$. totally whatever. hehz. so didnt. somehow, i lost marcia's shoebag. hehz. so funny. marcia was on the verge of crying but she didn. scare me. holdin2 the bag den gone. g-o-n-e. bleahz. asked the lady den wen to the counter & we found it. hehz. my dear pts gave me a lecture on being careful cos i'm a vice-chair. hahahz. yesh darlin~. hahahz. totally. hehz. but i'm responsible wad?? helped u find/asked ard. [winked]
ok~ downloadin the pictures alr. better do it b4 the flight. hehz. later kena warnin again ar. hahahz. shhh~...
//06 is it worth it likin her??
slept over at muh cousin place den went out with pei han & stacy. hahahz. so fun? okla quite. a lil'-- but was not really myself. was rather quiet. hehz. whatever karmila. hehz.
flyin off to australia. yeah~. hahahz. be back on monday. muhahahz. anw yar~ whatever. have to pack. bleah~ hate packin. alws ended up gettin scoldin frm my mom cos i either packed "everythin" or nothin. hahahz. whatever. totally~. hahahz. shhh... boo~yah!
//06 fallin head over heels for [you]
oh ya~ if anythin to do with being in the dark. pls dun choose me. like in the cave. pls. hehz. i was totally freaked out. i tot there were others but no. the last gurl wen up & i said "next" but there was no one else cos i shined my torch ard. i was the last. i ran/climbed all the way out. i was freaked out. u evil pple. evil. dun choose me if it had anythin to do with being in the dark. evil. pls dun. i'm scared of being in the dark alone~. evil. evil!..
hah! in the mood to type. shall not waste this precious moment? hah!
we were tortured e 1st day. argh~ hahhaz. campin was fun. come 2 think of it but not at tt moment. when ure out there, slpin in a small tent sharin with 3 other gurls & it's wet & in e middle of e night u hear footsteps. hahz. the toilet. oh my god the toilet. disgusting. yucks. it's not 4human use. hah. none of us -3a,3c&3mm- bathed the 1st day. if u see the conditions of the well water u'll understand y! it's-- it's milky & insects are 'happily swimmin' inside. hah.
the night walk. i lurve the night walk! [grin] stupid pangsai. she lead us senget 1. hah. so fun. walkin in total darkness with only the help of 1 candle. 1 candle!! sharin with 20pple?! hah! whatever. [her] hands so nice to hold. so~ warm. shhh~ but now, the sight of [her] makes me sick. jus wanna slap [her] face.
went cavin. so fun. squeezin thru the rocks. so fun. challenges. i like. up & down. so fun. afte all the hard work, we reached this lord of the ring area. you know the part where they showed legolas home? hahz! yup. we're like~ wher's my legolas?? where's my legolas. hahz. den followed by abseiling~ argh~ i injured myself. the instructor asked me 2jump off. go down. ey luffed at me. hah! whatever. talkin bout safety eh. stup~. hate it. ask me how val went down. hah! ask me! hahz. me & yolanda were grapin our stomach, tryin not 2luff 2o loud. hah!
when the nxt grp came. all of us were jumpin up & down. never felt so happy seein the sight of buses. hah! so funny but wad cracks me up was that the next grp esp suganya thought that we're happy to see them. hah! totally not! we're happy to see the bus. the b-e-u-ti-ful bus which will bring us out of hell & to heaven, the chalet. hahz.
the chalet was alrite. i'm grateful though. as least we get to bathe in clean water! air-conditioned. nice comfy bed. hah! went plantation tour the nxt day. hah! it was borin cos the sun was freakin hot. it got to us. hah. learnt new things though. that the female oil palm seed were bigger then the male's; jus like ying wei & valery. hah! [grin].
den we had bamboo raftin. hah. so fun. stup mr. francis. he only adds weight. we were the second last. mr.f went down & decided to push the raft. it didn help!!!! the river or whatever u called it was filty. it's brownish in color. it has mosquitoe's eggs floatin in it. hah! yucks. we were 1st afte all of us suddenly had the motivation 2 row/paddle. hah! we even took off sandles 2 use it as oars. hahz. fun! stup mr.f!
the canopy walk was fun. hah! great. i like. i was jumpin. so fun. the scenery up there were like so~ nice. hah.
den we had to hike up to see the view of the tamn negara. it was really high & tiring yet fun cos mr.f was with us. tt big belly freak. hah. FUN.
i like & 4 the 1st time durin the camp, we ate d-e-li-cious food. hah. den went back in a boat, 1an a half hour. it was so~ cold. pei & i were up front. yup. hah. so fun. yup. hah. the wind was blowin at our faces. we were happily chattin when suddenly we turned to see that everyone was slpin. like okay? so we oso slept. like totally whatever cos it rain. the raindrops were like so~ sharp. hah. like knife tryin to cut thru our face. mr.f passed canvas to us. first we use it as a blanket, to cover our legs den we doze off but it wasn comfortable cos the drops were still 'attackin' our faces. so~ we compeletely covered ourselves.. in other words we're underneath the canvas. hah~! but what really tickled my toes was that to think pei & i could actually fall aslp underneath the canvas. hah. we're dang tired. hahahhz.
the train came an hour late. stup! poor time management. mr.f lied to us. as usual. evil. to think i trusted u evil freak. hahahz. no lady walkin up & down, sellin stuff. hahaz. evil. but fun. hah. hmmm. we slept, talked & played. hahahz. fun2. but i wanna go home. missed home. a lil. but stil wan to have fun. hahhaz. so funny. hahahz.
made loads of frens. form closer bonds. it was fun. like it here . stc! yea. hah. stup mr.f!!!
thought home was a safe place but it aint. it followed me home. thought tt i had overcomed my worst fear; my temper but i hadnt. durin camp, it was so cool so fine. didn yell at anyone; didn lose control. but i had to somehow infront of my family. my hands had to move fast. i had to swing the gate damn hard. so hard till it closes with a loud bang. with a statement. i had to do tt b4 i think. den it leads to me gettin scolded & my sisters & mom quarrelled. ok~ whatever. fish in the market man. whatever. i'm evil. m i? ok~ dun ans.
gone to taman negara.. hahahz... i'm gonna miss s'pore.... NOT! wahahhaz. cant wait. wahahhaz. stil haven finis packin. wahhahaz.
school was alrite. got back some of my marks. hehz? it was wad i expected though. lousy~. ok~ wadever. [rolled eyes]
durin cme, jes & ying wei made me luff so hard that i started to cry. hahhaz. stupid horny shit. ying wei's has inverted oreo cookies & protruding toot. hahhaz. hmmm~ their song- jes/rose dance in nude- went out wif duke. chee ko phek~ chee ko phek~.. ok2 [inside joke]. shld have seen their dance step. hahhaz. had to dicuss bout this 2picuture ar~. 1 of the pics have this plate of kuihs. den suddenly we talked bout wad kind of kuihs,cakes we liked to eat. totally out of the point. the tcher asked us to go 1st cos we're noisy. kz. went up & talked totally out of point. as usual but haik la.
when town afte that with nithiya, liyana, rachel & kirthika. ate at ljs. yar. duno y but had a feelin of wantin to msg him. so~ i did la. hhaahz. but totally evil! he left w/o saying goodbye. was luffin all the way den suddenly he's gone~!! fine wadever [stare] be like that....! i think rite the ljs door has a thing against me eh~ evil... stup~. it didn opened the door frm inside for me. bloodie hell. like for 4 times but it did for others. think very funny zit? den the grp sittin near there luffed at me~. fine~ totally maluted. wadever. argh~ evil~ this world is full of evil pple and evil things. argh~...
//o6 booh~...hehehez [i think i'm so~ funny..]
is smthg wrong wif my blog?? seem like it?? argh~ fish la~ everything's wrong!!
like totally finally CA's ended. thank god for that but wad a way to end it. i didn really send much time with my cousin wasnt close to her. but duno why i cried so much. why? the way she looked on the bed. feelingless. her fingers were cold. her face were freezing. tubes pokin everywhere. machines beeping. air pumping into her heart as if she was some kind of toy. hate it! get it out of her..! puull everything out! damn it! she's not some kind of freak... she-- can breathe on her own. why is her body so cold?? cant stand it. cried like totally 4 times. the way her mom spoke/whispered to her... broke my heart. tears flowing none stop. cant stand it.
they made me talked to her. indirectly forcin me to. i whispered in her right ear. i rubin her fingers while askin for forgiveness. forgive me cos i wasnt close to her. shld have spent more time with u~--. i duno why but the words jus went out. asked her to wait a while longer. dun leave. wake up. cant bear to see her in this state. when i looked up. everyone was lookin at me but i caught her fren's eyes lookin deep into mine den i started to cry... tears jus flow out like i've been keepin them for smthg.. for someone--. why must this happen to her?? why?? which fucking bastard hit her?? and still have the guts to drive off?? u heartless insentive m0nster u! she looked as if she was sleepin. so peaceful. so nice~. so-- beutiful.
but- why did i cry so much?? i wasnt even close to her. but why cant i let a drop out for my uncle 2 years back when i was so darn close to him. i called him daddy. hehz. that santa claus. always scoldin my mother cos he thinks "my mother starved me". hehz -tears-. he was a hockey player too u kn0? i jus found- that out--recently... and he taught me to fold napkins the way his hotel folded-- but i- f0rgot-- how to... he taught me how to ride a bicycle. hehz. everythin he has done for me and i didn listen to his last instruction or wish. to stay behind and wait a while longer. i was fuckin stupid! i had to be tired on that damn day. i "had" to go home cos i "wanted" to slp. serve u right karmila!! argh~ got home & the fone rang... he's gone-- argh~ why?? i'll never forgive myself... first daddy and now kak fizah~
//06 wonderin when is my turn--
hey hey~ guess wad?? i kno how to do the~ chem test but physics?? bye bye bye~? duno a darn thing. damn. yar~ den when the tcher was collectin the e'maths paper i totally found out how to do the last question but i was too darn late. damn~ but all i did was "oh" looked at wei zuan & told her i kno how to do alr but no time. den we luff. ok~? [touch forehead] no fever leh... okz. wadever. hehz. haiya~... bio was damn hard. hahz. but nvm. my mom said she excused my DIZ CA only. yup. good la~ but stil am trying my darness ok~... pictures are up! yup.
jus now, saw dis guy. u kno the adverstisement?? the.. if ur happy & u kno it, clap ur hair?? ahhahaz... yar totalleh~ his hair was like that. i couldn helped but lookin/starin. hahhaz. wad kind of statement are u tryin to send out?? huh?? totalleh cool dude-- NOT! so tryin to be different. like whatever. okz. hehz. but v. er~ i duno wad to say la. hahhaz. at least his pants was not tappered, rite?? hahhaz. saw his hair den quickly glanced down to his pants cos he's a mly. hah. wanted to c wheder he's does typical losified pple. hehz. okz.
gtg.. ss & mly tmr. yup. world peace pple! [inside joke] oh yar~ mini skirt is using my table. she's sittin diagonally behind me & beside pei han. den everytime i turned to talk to pei, she's looked to see wad we're talkin bout. like her eyes are starin like that! argh~ shoo~ go away. but my "members" are all around me. yeahZ~ and i'm sittin rite under the fan. so coolin yet cold... stop tryin to waste time karmila~!!! hahahz.. byes
fuck shit dammit mother fuckin asshole~ argh~!! todays bio paper is postponed to tmr cos we left early cos had a match against crescent -we won- so that means tmr there's combine physics & bio in the morning den in the aftrn e'maths den stay back sch for bio. argh~!!! 3 sciences in a day. argh~ damn damn damn. fish man!!!
u kno rite~ jus now in at **, saw 1 good looking bung. wahahahhaz. sat beside us. wahahahhaz. [cant stop smilin] kept lookin at her... oops~ i meant "him" hahahz. until super obvious & totally forgot that i was staring or rather "mesmerizing" hahahhaz... den another bung -ugly 1- whispered to her den she looked at me so i looked away la. hehz. paiseh liao. caught red handed. den she went to sylvia & pointed to their fone cos it was the same model and the same casing den smile2d but~ damn it sia... when she started speaking or rather when she let her voice out~ dot dot dot... it spoils everything. i mean u kno la. hahahz. appearance 9 upon 10 but voice super girl. i meant those girl girl type u kno?? yar. strike off! cancel! next! hahahhaz. kz... wadeva. shldnt waste time. shld study. byes. hehz
to sylvia~ : if ur "just so happen stealin fotos" pls tel me ur imagestation website cos i 1 our foto!!!! hahahahz
.:me:.
.:wishingfor:.
.: scream :.
amalina
karmila
lala
hockey
| zerosix |
theresian
30th April 1989
4 saint clare'04
silencer
you =))
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